Selma's Story Time - 7/31/14

Mrs. Stockton saw it on the 6:00 PM news. A 49 year old police officer was shot. It reminded her of the day she heard that her son, Martin had been killed. He was a police officer who had been shot by a 19 year old kid who  was in possession of drugs and didn't want to go to jail. He ended up going to jail for a lot longer than he would have for just having the drugs.

 

The police officer that was shot today was Daniel Edwards. He was shot by someone he pulled over on a routine traffic stop. Mrs. Stockton imagined what happened. He just walks up to the car to talk to the guy and then he gets shot in the head. That simple, that fast. Witnesses saw him drive away from the scene. How can people be so selfish? They think that they are going to be able to get away. Don't they realize that by shooting them, they are getting into more trouble? In the passion of the moment, probably not.

She was startled by the ringing of the phone,

"Hello Mom", her son David said.

David was her youngest son. He was Shelby's Dad.

"David, how are you?"
"I'm good. I heard about the police shooting in your area. How are you doing?"
"Well, the shooting was on the other side of town, but I am feeling a little scared and sad."
"I feel the same way when these things happen. Marty always comes to mind and it makes my heart ache."
"I miss him, David. I wish that I could have had the chance to talk to him one more time. That kid took him away from me."
"Took him away from all of us, Mom."
"But, he wasn't your son," she said, her voice starting to sound upset. 
"He was my brother. And I loved him too," David replied in a calming tone.

Mrs. Stockton knew that she had never fully gotten over Marty's death. The police department had someone come over and talk to them about how they were feeling about what happened. Her grieving has been hard. She had her son taken away from her for no reason.

"It's still so hard honey," she replied almost in tears.
"I know Mom. And it always will be."

She just let down and started to cry. 

"Mom, do you want me to have Shelby stop by? I don't really want you to be alone right now."

She wished that David was there to hug her, but he lived in Nebraska. Shelby was about 45 minutes away at Columbia, but she didn't want to disturb her from her studies.

"No honey, I will be o.k. This is not the first time this has happened. And it will happen again."
"That is sad to say, but you are right. Being a police officer is not a safe job, but it has only gotten more dangerous."
"Thank you for calling me though. It was nice to hear your voice and feel your support."
"I'm always here for you, even though I live far away."
"I know honey. I love you very much."
"Love you too Mom. Are you going to be o.k.?"
"Yes, David. I will be."
"O.k., I am going to do my rounds at the hospital now. If you need me, please call."
"I will honey!"

They said their good-byes. She remained on her sofa for a moment and then went into her bedroom. She pulled a small oak box out from her closet. She sat down on the bed and opened it. Inside were things that belonged to Marty. Most of his possessions were saved in a box and given to his son Ben, who was only three at the time. She picked up the framed picture which was on top. It was of Marty after he graduated from the Police Academy. She smiled at it. He had that quirky grin ever since he was a kid. She loved that about him.

"I miss you so much Marty," she said to the picture. "I wish you were here to see Ben. I'm sure that you see him from heaven every day, but he is doing really well at Ohio State, where you went to school. I don't think that the basketball coach really knows what to do with him, like they didn't know what to do with you."

She put the photo back in the box. She held her hands clasped in front of her heart and took a deep breath. She felt a warmth surround her that could only be her son. The feeling is what she tries to remember, not what happened to her son. But each time it happens to another officer, it always reminds her of what happened to Marty that day. His picture brings her back to what she should remember, the spirit of Marty Stockton, her son.

7/30/14

This blogging session seems to have gone on its own track. Started off as an observation about how editing makes an idea into a story and wound up writing about how I am feeling about myself lately. I know I need to let the creative process take its own course and let whatever is going on inside of me come out. But looking back at what I have written so far, I'm not sure where things are really going. Let's try and get this one back on track....

 

Creative writing has taken me on many adventures. It has always been amazing to see how the rough draft of a post starts out and how the final draft ends up. It's like watching a painter create a picture in their head of what they want to paint and bring that picture to life on a blank canvas. The colors and forms fill up the picture and in the end becomes a work of art.

Sometimes I just start writing about something, an observation I'm making about something currently going on in my life. This summer has been a lot about baseball in our family, so a lot of my time has been around kids and doing things with them. So, I'm thinking about those experiences and relating it back to what I did when I was their age. 

 

The editing process is the key to making the final post a success. Making sure there are just enough words to make the idea clear to the reader without being too wordy. Or making sure I'm saying what I want to say with the words that I've chosen. Thank goodness we have computers and cut and paste options to help with that process. Makes it a lot easier to move paragraphs around and have a second set of eyes on spelling.

 

When does it become time for a story to take flight? When is it ready for the world to see? When it says what you want it to say and your brave enough to put it out there. Like the cover photo on my Facebook page says, "Fear stops most people from writing, not lack of talent." Writing can be a way to share thoughts outside yourself. I used to journal my thoughts in notebooks and on the computer. Over the years I have gotten braver and braver at sharing those thoughts with others. 

By working on my writing again, I've been tapping into some creative energy that has been inside of me, waiting to come out. Seems to be coming out and taking me in many different directions. Sometimes staying on track with an idea and sometimes going off on multiple tangents. All a part of the creative process. I know what I  write is a personal choice, but there are many ways to do it. To bring the idea across to the reader in a creative but interesting way can be fun fun, but also very challenging. 

 

Blogging has helped me do a little bit of writing everyday and work on honing the craft. And, to experience some of the most special moments in my life again.

7/29/14

Being involved in the kids baseball season brings back lots of memories for me. After experiencing the end of one of this year's travelling seasons with the boys, it made me pull out some of my pictures and articles from my softball career last night.

 

The smell of old newspaper greeted me as I looked through the photos and articles. My softball years spanned eight years, starting when I was ten and ended when I was eighteen. Seeing the pictures from my first T-Ball team, the Giants to the different sponsored teams that I played on. Some of the girls in those pictures, I'm still in touch with thanks to Facebook. Remember the good ole days up at the Little League Fields? Did you know that our league started in 1957? Do you remember the Twenty-Fifth Anniversary All Star games in 1982?

Reading through the articles, I saw that my name was mentioned having had two hits in a game a couple of times. I have a couple of trophies in my keepsake box from some of the successes I have had in softball. But not all successes are measured by having a trophy. Just being able to play has helped me to become who I am today and helped me to be involved in what Max and Mitch are doing in baseball now.

One of the memories I have from my childhood is biking up to the ball park to play softball for my summer league growing up. The field was about a half mile from my house, right between an airport and a golf course on the east end of town. Some of the team pictures I have show the airport in the background. We used to ride on the sidewalk all of the way up there. The fields are no longer there. The song, "It used to be my playground" by Madonna, runs through my head as I think about it now.

My primary position was catcher and I would bat first because I was able to get on base a lot. It was neat getting on base, waiting for my teammates to hit me in. Felt like you were helping your team score points while you stood on the base cheering them on. I wasn't the best player and I wasn't the worst player but I came to the field every day to play the game and hopefully help my team win. Getting treat tickets after the game to get a soda and some candy was another favorite memory of mine.

Our team went to the State Tourney in St. Cloud. My Mom had written all of the team names in the brackets for who won and who lost each game. Looks like we only made it to the second round that year. Whether we made it to State or played through just the regular season together, once it ended I would miss heading to the field and playing on a team with those girls.

One of the best things about playing team sports is meeting kids you may not have gotten to know in school. The experience gave us something to have in common and made us friends. We shared a chapter or more in each other's lives growing up, creating a camaraderie that will always be with us. How about the team pictures that sometimes get posted on Facebook? 

I carry fond memories of those times in my heart.

7/28/14

The last day of this season...

So far they had a 3-0 record in the tournament and made it to Sunday's bracket play. Dad keeps telling him to get ready. He is excited to play, but it is so hard to get going for the early morning games. But, thinking about the feeling that comes when he steps onto that field to play makes it all worth it.

 

Sitting on the couch waiting for his uniform jersey to dry, he watched his parents get the cooler and snack bag set up for the day. The outcome of the first game would determine how long they would be at the fields. So, the supplies had to be planned out for the entire day. Win one, play two more. Lose one, all done.

He napped in the car on the way and woke up just in time to see the sign for Arrowwood Fields. Getting out of the car a little bit groggy, he got his equipment bag out of the trunk. He perked up when he saw some of the team already warming up at field #2. He felt good about being there and headed over. He hung his equipment bag on the fence, took out his glove and hustled into the outfield to play catch with one of his teammates.

The morning games always came with a chill to them, since the sun hasn't had a fair chance to warm things up. The sun was beginning to shine through the clouds and he could smell the freshly cut grass. The field was just starting to wake up with the warmth of the sun.

"Hey guys, let's take some batting practice," the coach called out to them.

They hustled in to the dugout to get their bats and helmets and headed over to the batting cages. The other team was warming up and seemed to be a little sluggish too. The excitement for the game was there, but the body wasn't feeling it quite yet.

Finally, the umpire said,

"Let's play ball!"

The other team was up to bat first, so his team took their positions in the field and the game got under way. The struggle for momentum went back and forth throughout the game. The fear of losing this game hung over both teams. For the loser, it meant their season would be coming to an end. When the team made an error, the fear of losing took hold and made it harder to battle back. But they had to find a way to do it, if they wanted to win the game and move on to the next round.

After a couple of hours, the game came to an end. The other team won and was moving on to the next round. His team finished as one of the top eight teams in the tournament. He felt sad that the season was over. He wouldn't be having the same games and practices with his teammates two to three times a week and his family wouldn't be coming to the field to watch him play again until next season.

 

Each player walked away from the field with their own family. They waved and congratulated each other for having a good season. Everyone drove away from the field in their own direction having shared a chapter of their life story.

 

What will he remember about his last day of this season? At first, it will probably be the fact that they lost. But hopefully it will become one of many good memories of playing baseball.

Selma's Story Time - Mrs. Stockton Recap - 7/26/14

It makes me mad when other people take things that don't belong to them, whether they steal it or just take it. And, it makes me mad that I have to lock up everything in my house or in my car for fear that someone will take it from me. On the way home from a family vacation one year, we stopped at a hotel in Philadelphia to stay the night. We left some of our belongings in the car and the next morning, most of it was gone, including a 35mm camera that my Dad had since he was a teenager. I'm sure that camera meant a lot more to my Dad than it did to the guy who took it and probably sold it for some cash.

 

One of the reasons people take things from others is for the sheer thrill of taking them. They feel like they are getting away with something. It's like kids in the movies that dare each other to go into their local grocery store and put some penny candies into their pockets and run out into the street. In the next scene, they gather back at the clubhouse and take inventory of their efforts. Another reason is to exert power over someone else. They take something to get back at them or they know the person would do anything to get it back. In these cases, if they don't get the satisfaction off of the power play from the other person, they windup just getting rid of something that meant a lot to someone else but, in the end, really meant nothing to them.

 

Johnny Kidler took the watch from Mrs. Stockton because he knew it meant something to her. It fell out of her pocket and she really didn't want him to have it. So, that made him want it even more. She was afraid of him from the constant bullying, so he already had power over her. He didn't need to take the watch. but, he did, and sells it at a flea market so he could go to the movies. Mrs. Stockton carries the guilt for the loss of the pocket watch for many years, and is why she felt she needed to contact him and try and put some closure on what happened that day.

 

I wish that people would put themselves in someone elses' shoes before they decided to bully or physically take something from them. How would they feel if it happened to them? Asking ourselves this question is how we activate our conscience. It ultimately helps us make the right choices to do onto others as we would like them to do onto us. 

 

Did you like the story about Mrs. Stockton? What were your thoughts about it? How did it make you feel? Please feel free comment on this post.

Selma's Story Time - 7/25/14

They settled into the chairs by the computer desk, and set their tea cups down on the woven cloth coasters that Shelby had made for Mother's Day a few years back. 

 

"Do you think he still has it?" Shelby asked.
"I'm not sure. It has been on my mind since the whole thing happened. I guess I need to find out for sure. So, can you show me how to find him on the internet?"
"Sure," Shelby answered, "click on the icon that looks like a globe, that represents the internet."
"How does that represent the internet?"
"It's the World Wide Web," Shelby replied.

Mrs. Stockton clicked on the globe and in a few seconds, a search engine page popped up on the screen.

"Now, type Johnny's name in the box and hit enter. We'll start with that."

She typed the name into the box and pressed enter. A few seconds later, a few search results popped up.

"Now we look through these and see if anything looks familiar. Hey, this one talks about Frankton. Let's click on that one."

Mrs. Stockton took the mouse and clicked on that link. All of a sudden, a picture of Johnny popped up on the screen.

"That's him!" She exclaimed, "that's Johnny!"

Shelby didn't think they would find anything that fast.

"It's an article about him and his auto service shop. Looks like he still lives in Frankton. We can now do a search on his name in the city of Frankton and get his address," Shelby said.

She had her Grandmother start a second search, specific to Johnny Kidler, Frankton. An address and phone number popped up on the screen.

"They have this much information about people on the internet?" Mrs. Stockton asked.

"Even more, if you know how to do searches. Some pages you need passwords to get into."

"Amazing," Mrs. Stockton said.

"Well, should we try and call him?"

"I'll make the call tomorrow," her Grandma said. It's too late to call tonight."

 

************
 

Mrs. Stockton finished her soup and crackers and had the dishes put away by 6:30 PM. She decided that she was going to call at 7:30 PM, after dinner but not too late. She tried to watch a show on TV to distract her, but it didn't work. Time was moving so slow that when the the clock on the mantle finally said 7:30, she felt like she had waited for years. She dialed the number they had found on the internet and let it ring. After four rings, a male voice answered,

"Hello?"

"Johnny Kidler?"

"This is. Who is this?"

"My name is Shirley Stockton, well it was Hanson when you knew me."

"I'm sorry lady, I don't know who you are."

"I'm the girl you took a pocket watch from many years ago. We used to get off the bus at the same place and you would make a nasty habit of teasing me."

There was silence on his end of the line. Mrs. Stockton's hand was shaking while she was holding the phone. It was crazy that she still felt a little scared of him after all of this time. 

"Hello?" Mrs. Stockton said to break the silence.

"I'm still here. You know, I do vaguely remember that watch. It was gold, right?"

"Yes, it was," Mrs. Stockton replied anxiously.

"Well, I don't have it any more. I sold it."

"Why did you do that?" she asked, sounding disappointed with his answer.

"A day or two later, I took it to the travelling flea market and sold it for cash. Then I went to the movies."

"So you picked on me, took something that meant a lot to me and sold it so you could go to the movies?"

"At the time, it's what I wanted to do. I didn't know that watch meant so much to you and your family. Probably wouldn't have mattered to me though." 

"That's just terrible," Mrs. Stockton replied.

"I was just a dumb kid at that time. What did you think I did? Saved it in a box to give back to you someday?"

"That would have been nice. What did I ever do to you?"

"Again, lady. I was just a dumb kid who was looking for something to do."

Mrs. Stockton was really bummed out about the watch. She had been holding out hope that she would get her family heirloom back. She now had to accept the fact that it was gone forever. 

 

"Well thank you for your time," Mrs. Stockton said.

"Sorry I didn't have what you were looking for."

"I guess I did find something I wasn't looking for, closure. I can thank you for that," she replied.

 

They got off the phone and she sat there for a minute not sure how she she was feeling. Shocked that it didn't work out the way she wanted, but maybe in a way relieved that Johnny didn't have it.

Selma's Story Time - 7/24/14

As she drove to Mount Vernon on Monday afternoon, she was excited to see her Grandma and have a home cooked dinner. Pulling into the driveway, she saw the two story red brick house with dark green shutters. It felt like she was home. Shelby got out of the car and saw Oxford standing by the fence surrounding the Tinkers' backyard. He was looking at her with his head titled to one side. When she arrived at the fence, he greeted her with a wet tongue on her hand. Shaking her hand to dry it off, Shelby smiled at the big dog and he wagged his tail.

 

"Hi honey. He's a sweet dog, isn't he?" Her Grandma asked as she walked up to meet her.
"Just like you say he is," she replied.

 

They hugged each other for awhile, then Mrs. Stockton said, "let's go in the house. Dinner is almost ready."

 

They walked into the house and the aroma of fresh baked apple pie filled the air.

 

"You always out do yourself, Grandma."
"Since your Grandpa passed away, I need someone to take care of."
"Thank you. But someone should be taking care of you," Shelby said, "how about you sit down and I'll serve the wonderful dinner you made for us."
"That would be nice Shelby, but I can do it."
"I know you can, but let me this time," she said and pulled a chair out from the table for her to sit down.
"So tell me about your project," Shelby said as she pulled two plates out of the cupboard.
"I want you to help me find someone."
"Yes, someone who bullied you on the bus when you were a kid. Why do you want to find him?"
"He has something of mine that I want back. He made me give it to him so he would stop picking on me."
"What is it?" Shelby asked.

 

Mrs. Stockton didn't know whether she could tell her Granddaughter that information. It was still pretty hard for her to admit to herself how much it has bothered her all this time. What she gave away that day wound up being a lot harder to deal with over the years than the teasing was at the time.

"It was a pocket watch that would now be a six generation heirloom. It was made of gold and was a gift that was received for your Great-Great-Great Grandfather's years of service on the railroad."

"How did Johnny get it from you?"

"I brought the watch to school for show and tell. After we got off of the bus, he was following me home, teasing me about being short. I turned around to tell him stop and the watch flew out of my pocket. Until then, he had no idea I even had it."

"Why did he want it?" Shelby asked.

"It meant something to me. He told me he would stop teasing me if I gave it to him."

"What did your parents say?"

"They didn't know that I took it to school. A while after that, they couldn't find it. My Dad was pretty upset about it, but they decided it must have just got lost."

 

They finished up dinner talking about Shelby and what was going on at Columbia. After dessert, they cleaned up the dishes and headed to the porch with some tea. Mrs. Stockton was getting anxious as it became time to start the search for Johnny.

Selma's Story Time - 7/23/14

Mrs. Stockton had grown up in Frankton, a small town in upstate New York. She and her husband moved from there to Mount Vernon, NY when he was offered a teaching position at Columbia. Shelby would come to visit her Grandparents every summer and Grandpa would take her to work with him. His love for the campus made her fall in love with it. When it came time to make the choice of colleges to attend, she already made her choice. Shelby was sad that he wasn't there when she became an enrolled student, but she felt him by her side everyday in the memories they shared.

While studying at the library, Shelby saw her Grandma's e-mail about dinner on Monday. Oh she did love the Mac and Cheese, and her Grandma knew how to make it. Baked in the oven, not made on the stove top. Shelby was also excited because her Grandma would send her home with leftovers. Perfect meal for the starving college student.

 

She was getting concerned about her Grandma wanting to find this Johnny Kidler. Why did she want to? Did she want to make peace with what happened on the bus? Or was she just curious about who he had become? They knew nothing about this guy, except that she knew who he was many years ago. The whole project seemed a little bit on the risky side. What if he was a bad man? What if he didn't even remember her? Hopefully he wasn't a mean or violent person. She would hate for her Grandma to come up against that when she was trying to understand what happened to him.

When her Grandma got something in her head, she always needed to find out the information or resolve the issue to be at peace. That is probably half the reason why she is doing this.

 

Shelby wondered if her Grandma had any reservations about pursuing this project. She guessed that she would find out on Monday.

Selma's Story Time - 7/22/14

On Thursday morning, Mrs. Stockton poured the hot water over her mint tea bag and went to the computer desk on the three season porch. That was the spot she went to every morning, it  gave her a nice view of the Tinkers' backyard and their dog Oxford. Oxford was a Foxhound, who was bred as hunting dog and ultimately wound up trained as a family pet. Has a pretty big bark, but wouldn't hurt a thing. Mrs. Tinker let him out about a half hour ago when she went for her daily run. She was usually gone about an hour.

 

Mrs. Stockton watched Oxford sniff around the yard as she took in the smell of freshly mowed grass from her neighbor's yard behind her. Then she saw the squirrel making his way through the yard with a peanut in his mouth. She named him Monte. He was going to the tree in the middle of the yard, where the nest was, because that is what he does every day. Oxford had made his way up by the back of the house, waiting for Mrs. Tinker to come home and open the door.

 

She watched the squirrel just hop around calmly towards the tree and climbed right on up when it got there. Mrs. Stockton would have to watch tomorrow to see if Oxford could make things more interesting.

 

Shaking her head at what just happened, she turned the computer on to see if she got a message from Shelby. As her email opened up on the screen, she saw the mail box flag up, indicating that she had mail. She clicked on the mail box on the screen and saw a message from her Granddaughter. She read it and responded...

My dearest Shelby,

Yes, Monday would work fine for me. Let's plan on 5:30 PM. I'll make the baked Mac and Cheese, your favorite. Looking forward to seeing you honey.

                                                                                Love you very much,

                                                                                          Grandma

She knew it would be so hard to have to wait until then, but she didn't want to put any additional pressure on Shelby. She had worked very hard to get a scholarship to go to Columbia University, which was her first choice. Mrs. Stockton felt very lucky that the school was near her house so Shelby could stop over. As she clicked on the icon to take her to the morning news, Mrs. Stockton knew would have to find something to keep herself busy until Monday.

Selma's Story Time - 7/21/14

Shelby saw the e-mail from her Grandma. It started off the usual way...

Hi honey! How are you? How is school? I am so proud of you!

After the opening line, she would tell her all about what was going on in her neighborhood. Starting with what the new neighbors, the Tinkers, were up to. They had a dog named Oxford, which Grandma loved to watch chase squirrels in the backyard, because the squirrels always seem to outsmart him. Then it would go into what happened with the church ladies at Sunday service that week. Shelby enjoyed the e-mails, it was like getting updates on a continuing saga whenever she received one.

This time the e-mail was different. Her Grandma wanted her to come over for dinner some night soon and help her to find someone from her past. A kid that had bullied her on the bus. Shelby thought the idea was interesting, but also a little strange. Why would her Grandma want to bring up all of the sad feelings she must have had about it. Shelby was curious what happened to bring all of this up again. Her Grandma had not given her much information, she wanted to talk to her about it in person.

Shelby wrote a reply e-mail...

Dear Grandma,

     

     I would love to come over for dinner and help you with your project. I have a pretty heavy load for homework and papers due this week. How about next Monday? I know you typically have dinner at 5:30 PM, so just let me know if the date works.

                                                                                          Love you,

                                                                                                    Shelby

Selma's Story Time - 7/19/14

It had been a long time since Mrs. Stockton thought about Johnny, so she was surprised that he came to mind now. She wondered what has happened to him since the good ole school days. He was three years older than her, so she never saw him at school reunions. How would she be able to find out?

Back in her day, it would start with looking through information at the library, old yearbooks, newspaper articles archived on microfische, and phone books. Most everything in her time was driven off of physical addresses and telephone numbers to contact people. Once those changed and if one didn't get the new information, a person would lose track of people. Now with social media and people keeping their cell phone numbers when they move, people are able to stay connected. 

She watched many TV shows about reunions of people who have found each other after years of not seeing them. Even her Granddaughter, Shelby, talked about how her friend's Mom had found her long lost sister by using the internet. Last Mother's Day, her son, Greg, had gotten her a computer, and Mrs. Stockton had gotten pretty good at using it by sending e-mails to her Grandchildren.

Walking over to the desk where the computer was set up, she decided to fire it up and start her search. Greg had preset the computer to just click on icons to get to what she wanted to do, but she wasn't sure where to start. Should she call her son to have him help her? She wasn't sure that she wanted to share her project with him. She decided to click on the e-mail icon and sent an e-mail to Shelby to find out what she has been up to. 

 

Selma's Story Time - 7/18/14

Mrs. Stockton loved to hear the school bus as it came down her street every morning, picking the kids in the neighborhood up for school. She had fond memories of riding the school bus, sitting with her best friend Shelly Waters every day. They giggled a lot and talked about wanting the clothes and hair ribbons that the popular kids wore. 

She also had some bad experiences associated with the bus. There was a kid named Johnny Kidler. He was called the Frankton bully. Everyone knew how mean he was to the other kids. Mrs. Stockton was one that Johnny chose to pick on, just because she was shorter than the other kids. Since they were the only two that got on and off the bus at their stop, he would follow her home every day calling her shrimp and shorty. 

He would sing this little song, in the teasing melody that we have all heard,

"Shirley is so shrimpy.

Shirley is a shorty.

Shirley is so shrimpy

Shirley is a shorty"

He would sing that song over and over again. Mrs. Stockton remembered having many nightmares about it. She would ask him over and over again to stop. That made him do it more.

Mrs. Stockton remembered what her Grandmother used to say about mean kids,

"Don't pay any attention to those mean kids and they will go away."

That was easier said than done. While it was happening to her, she couldn't see any way out. She felt she had to take the punishment Johnny was dealing out. There was no way she could tell someone, a parent, a teacher, or someone about it to make him stop, she felt that would just make it worse. It is a normal feeling to have, the bully wants you to feel that way. That's the only power that they have over you, and that is why they are doing the bullying in the first place.

People would say that Johnny was just teasing Mrs. Stockton, he didn't physically hurt her. Well, he did hurt her, emotionally. That can be just as bad or even worse than physically hurting someone. Neither one is ok to do to anybody.

Johnny eventually stopped teasing her, because it finally wasn't fun anymore. Mrs. Stockton had to put up with it until he stopped, because she was afraid to get help. Don't be afraid to get help. Situations like these have led to suicide, because kids don't feel like there is a way out. Don't be one of those kids. You are a special someone to someone, your family, your friends, even your teachers. You are important and deserve to be treated right.

7/17/14

Kids Giving Back - Mitch's umping his first game last night

The baseball association the kids play in offers an opportunity for the players to be the umpire for the younger kids games. It's a great way for them to give back to the organization and make a little money along the way. The kids have to be at least 13 to be involved in the program. Max started last year and has worked 6 games to date. 

Mitch was scheduled to work three other games throughout the season. Due to our rainy weather this summer, he had rescheduled games for his team and his required attendance at a choir concert for school (his grade depended on it), that kept him from being able to do it.  Because Max ended up having a practice for his state tournament come up, he was unable to work one of his scheduled games, so last night became Mitch's first experience. Finally, he was able to get one in. 

He was pretty anxious before the game. We had to drop Max off, but Mitch just wanted to get to his field across town and didn't want to be late. The teams playing in this game were in the minor league division, 4th and 5th graders, light blue and red. We happened to know two of the kids on the light blue team, one is the younger brother of one of the players on Max's team and the other one is the son of a friend of Sam's. I wonder if knowing a couple of the players made Mitch feel more comfortable or more nervous. I will have to ask him.

I noticed that his confidence kept building while we watched the game. He was calling out the balls and strikes louder and standing more solid behind the catcher. Between innings, one of the players asked him how old he was. He said "I am 13." The player looked up at him and said "wow" like it was a really neat thing. The end result of the game was that the light blue team won to go undefeated for the season and Mitch completed his first game as an umpire. When I asked him how things went and how would he feel about doing it again, he said that it was good and he had fun. And he would love to do it again.

There are many lessons learned by the kids who take this challenge on, and the coaches understand they are learning them on the job. Most of them center around how hard the umpire's job is. Actually having the opportunity to do it gives them more appreciation for what the umpire goes through in a game.  Max said that he had a better appreciation of the umpire's job after his first time doing it, and tries not to be too hard on them because of it.They also learn more about the game, seeing it from behind home plate. Mitch commented on one of the kids playing center field was messing around with his hat and not paying attention to the game. When the player looked up, a ball was coming at him and sailed right over his head and he had to leave his hat on the ground to chase the ball down. Mitch had to bring himself back to the fact that there are a lot of other things happening on the field that he also has to keep track of as the umpire.  

What a great experience it was for Sam and I to be there to support him through a first time event in his life. Having the anxiety before the game, and being there to watch him work himself into the game and become comfortable to do the job at hand. The fact that the players (younger kids) look up to him as a role model, added to building his confidence. He did a great job last night, and I am glad it was such a good experience for him.

7/16/14

A different moment in time

Looking out my open bedroom window, I am enjoying the cool and crisp morning air. The sounds of birds chirping is all that can be heard. I have always been amazed at how quiet it is around my house, even though I live in the suburbs of a major metropolitan area. I moved here 11 years ago, leaving an apartment and getting into the first place I've ever owned.

When I was house hunting, my wish list included having an actual washer and dryer in my own place and being closer to work. I found a condo which is in a very residential part of town and across the street from a park reserve.  I love the fact that I'm not looking out my window at fast food restaurants or gas stations, getting away from the hustle and bustle of the city in the comfort of my own home.

There's a big evergreen tree outside my window. Lots of birds have made their homes there over the years. For a while it was a morning dove, who every morning at 5:00 or so would start cooing. When Molly was a puppy, at first she would almost growl under her breath at it to let her know she was there. But, after a while, she would just listen to it, accepting the fact that it really wasn't a threat to her or me, it was just welcoming the morning from its home in the tree.

For a while, it was just me living here as a single woman and her dog. Then along came Sam and the boys and now we have turned it into a full house with a lot of activity. The peace and quiet is not here as much as it used to be, but that allows me to have moments like now, before everyone is up to appreciate them. With all of us in the house, those moments along with our day to day life are what has become very special to me.

Be sure to recognize and appreciate these moments in time, whether you are with the ones you love or by yourself. Take that deep breath every once in a while to enjoy those special moments that life has to offer us.

7/15/14

One moment in time

As I was giving Molly a treat after our walk this morning, I saw the remains of last night's project. It brought a smile to my face...

After Max's team lost their first play off game 16-6 and Mitch had practice last night, we all gathered back at home to watch the All Star Game home run derby. Talk about a baseball family, we definitely are one! Max needed to have Sam, my fiancee, tighten up the laces of his fielder and catcher's gloves. As they get used and broken in, the leather loosens up. After getting those two gloves fixed and having watched Sam fix their gloves many times before, they took on a project themselves. We have a bin with the gloves that the kids and Sam have gone through in their baseball careers. Sam played baseball growing up and a little bit in college, we have his first baseball glove in that bin. Each of the kids have outgrown a couple and have each had that special one to them actually sustain a blow out, one from a loose lace and the other one actually has a hole in the webbing.

So, they each took out their own old broken glove and went to work to make it usable again. Working with a pair of needle nose pliers and a heavy duty project needle, they were able to bring these treasured items back to life.

It was one of those moments in life that I was proud to be a part of. They are growing into young men who are capable of doing some amazing things on their own. They are both good ball players and have a great passion for the game. It shows when each one of them takes the field for their respective teams. They are not perfect, but they go out there wanting to play and do their best. That's all that can be asked of them. 

Be sure to take notice of these moments of time that you are privileged to be a part of, either as a part of everyday life or the big milestone moments that ultimately make kids into the adults they are going to become someday.

7/14/14

With the beautiful weather we had yesterday, I took the day off to get some much needed relaxation. Kept on reading Mercy Falls out on the deck with Molly, while she laid out there and watched people and cars go by. The book is a good one, just like the previous four in the Cork O'Connor mystery series.

 

I thought about when I first got interested in creative writing. I remember writing in diaries when I was a girl, in the small leather bound books with the locks on them. They had one year and five year varieties. I have them put away with the other things I  saved from my childhood. I even have the keys on a key ring in my jewelry box. Made a point to keep them hidden from my brother, so he couldn't read the secrets I wrote about. Then it moved on to writing and telling silly stories. I have one of them on loose leaf notebook paper that I wrote in high school in my filing cabinet.  It is written in the form of a play. The characters were all based on members of our high school marching band and it was set in a Little House on the Prairie scene and story line. Some of the logistics of the story were way out there, but it was fun and made sense to where my writing was at then.

As goofy as it is, there may be some material in it that could actually work for a story. I think in any creative writing we do there are some good ideas, which may may not be obvious at the time. Sometimes creative writing can lead us on a journey to a place that you never expected to arrive at, like a reader gets out of reading a book. In some of the writing that I have done, it has gone exactly this way. I created a novel years ago that started in one direction and as I rode the creative process, the story ended differently than what I set out to do. I was surprised, but when I thought about it, that was where the story was supposed to end. That journey had a surprise ending, like many life journeys that each of us are on. 

Be patient and have faith that the journey you may be on will work out the way it is supposed to, even if it doesn't end up where we believe it should.

7/12/14

Our dog, Molly, started moving around and making noise to get us out of bed this morning ready to start her day. She decided that 8:00 would be the best time for that to happen, which I will admit is better than the normal 5:30 wake up time we have during the week. After seeing my fiancee out the door for his morning pick up, I took Molly for her walk around the neighborhood. It's a warm, humid and foggy morning. Will be a good day to be inside and get some home projects done.

Upon our return, I made a cup of chai, planning to sit down and read for a little bit before embarking on the massive cleaning of our house. I just started Mercy Falls, by William Kent Krueger, last night. I had the opportunity to meet him in person when I attended the Bloomington Art Center Writers' Festival and Book Fair in March of 2009 where he was the key note speaker, and taught a seminar on the Importance of Narrative in Your Writing.

I like his writing style, and the fact that his stories are set in Northern Minnesota, make them feel very familiar to me. To us Minnesotans, that area is considered Cabin country. When we say we are "going up north" that's where we are going. Lots of wooded area and lakes for relaxing, to get away from the hustle and bustle of the day to day life in the city. 

Krueger is a Minnesota author who has been known to do a lot of his writing at the St. Clair Broiler in St. Paul. I have often thought that I do my most productive writing away from home. Coffee shops, up at the cabin, and on vacations are places where I seem to get my best work done. However, the idea for The Hard Way was conceived during a vacation at home in April of 2013. I think it may have more to do with when you feel comfortable enough to let the writing just come out, good or bad. Some days that seem the least productive towards the goals of the main project, lead to ideas for other projects. That has it good points and it's bad points. It keeps the creative juices flowing, but it takes discipline to continue to get the goals of the main writing project done.

I have learned that writing is a process that probably won't be started and completed in one sitting. Learning how to ride the process, by taking the good ideas and putting them into my creative writing, is one of the most gratifying parts of being a writer. 

7/11/14

When I typed the date in the title section for today's blog, it reminded me of 7, 11 or doubles. Makes me feel like I should be in Vegas. Anyone feel lucky today?

Feeling pretty worn out after a pretty full week of baseball with the kids teams. Our family has had six games in the last five nights (one day both kids each had a game). Now the regular seasons are over and we move into the league playoff rounds next week. We now know who we are playing, but are waiting to finalize what field, what day and what time. We have had beautiful weather this week and I have really enjoyed being outside watching the games with the families of the other players on each team. What we all have come to know as our summer baseball families. Look forward to seeing you all next week.

There is a lot of buzz around town with the Major League All Star Game being played in Minneapolis on Tuesday. They are closing roads downtown to keep traffic moving around the vicinity of the field. It will be a great boost to our local economy, show what the Twin Cities has to offer when it comes to hosting these kinds of events, and showcase what a great venue Target Field is. I've seen it on TV a lot, but may be one of the few people in the Twin Cities area that hasn't been able to attend a game there yet.

Have you been to Target Field?

Hoping to get some projects done around the house and a big dose of relaxing as the kids have no scheduled games or tournaments this weekend. Will hopefully have some down time to work on writing projects that are in need of some attention on the journey to publishing my novel.